April 3rd, 2008


what else to say?

I think I'm going to lose my job.

Okay, so it's a thought that has crossed my mind several times in the last seven months, but it has especial potency today. I had a terrible mirgraine this morning-- I've been having them all week, but have been dragging myself to work regardless. The one I had this morning wasn't budging, though. It was a monster-- even the small light from my vanity was unbearable, and the thought of food had my mouth watering in that metalic way that has nothing to do with hunger. I called in sick.

The director called back, as I had a feeling she would. Harrassing sick staff members seems to be one of her particular pleasures. I didn't pick up the phone because I was starting to get those little pin-pricks of light in my vision, and my meds make me woozy anyway. She left a nasty message on my machine, about how I'm an "unreliable worker", and that we "need to have a talk" about how much time I've missed. (Twelve days, total-- three of which were from the Flu Stain that did the rounds in November and had several staff members out for a week). Other staff miss not only when they're sick, but when any of their children are sick. And yet I'm supposed to believe I'm the one that has missed the most, out of every body at the school? There's one lady who was out for a week because her husband had the flu.

Not to mention it's my first year working around such small children, and my immune system hasn't had time to build up against all the myriad germs that make their way in and out of the building each day.

I think she's looking for an excuse to fire me.

I'm going to the doctor later this afternoon to get a note, for all the dubious good that will do.

Oh, God. I've never ever been fired.
I hate to sound arrogant but-- I work so hard there and this is what I get?

My head is killing me.